Aslam

Praise be to Allah.For a man to shake hands with a non-mahram woman (one to whom he is not

related) is haraam and is not permitted at all. Among the evidence for this is the hadeeth

of Ma’qal ibn Yassaar (may Allaah be pleased with him) who said: “The Messenger

of Allaah

(peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: ‘If one of you were to

be struck in the head with an iron needle, it would be better for him than if he were to

touch a woman he is not allowed to.” (Reported by al-Tabaraani; classed as

saheeh by al-Albaani in Saheeh al-Jaami’, 5045).

There is no doubt that for a man to touch a non-mahram

woman is one of the causes of fitnah (turmoil, temptation), provocation of desire

and committing haraam deeds. No one should say that their intention is sound or their

heart is clean, because the one who was the purest of heart and the most chaste of all,

the Messenger of Allaah

(peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) never touched a

non-mahram woman, even when accepting bay’ah (oath of allegiance) from women.

He did not hold their hands when accepting their bay’ah, as he did with men;

their bay’ah was by words only, as was reported by his wife

‘Aa’ishah (may Allaah be pleased with her). She said that the Messenger of

Allaah

(peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) would test the believing women who

emigrated to him with the aayah (interpretation of the meaning): “O Prophet! When

believeing women come to you to give you the bay’ah (pledge), that they will not

associate anything in worship with Allaah, that they will not steal, that they will not

commit illegal sexual intercourse, that they will not kill their children, that they will

not utter slander, intentionally forging falsehood (i.e., by making illegal children

belong to their husbands), and that thye will not disobey you in any ma’ruf (Islamic

monotheism and all that which Islam ordains), then accept their bay’ah and ask Allaah

to forgive them. Verily Allaah is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful.” [al-Mumtahinah

60:12] ‘Aa’ishah said: “So whoever of the believing women agreed to

these conditions, the Messenger of Allaah

(peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him)

would say to her: ‘I have accepted your bay’ah by words.’ By Allaah,

his hand never touched the hand of any woman when accepting their bay’ah; he

accepted their bay’ah by saying ‘I have accepted your bay’ah

on this basis.’”

(Reported by al-Bukhaari, 4512; according to another report: he

accepted their bay’ah by words… the hand of the Messenger of Allaah

(peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) never touched the hand of any woman except a

woman he owned . Reported by al-Bukhaari, 6674).

Some Muslims feel too embarrassed to refuse when a woman offers her

hand to them. In addition to mixing with women, some of them claim that they are forced to

shake hands with fellow-students and teachers in schools and universities, or with

colleagues in the workplace, or in business meetings and so on, but this is not an

acceptable excuse. The Muslim should overcome his own feelings and the promptings of the

Shaytaan, and be strong in his faith, because Allaah is not ashamed of the truth. The

Muslim could apologize politely and explain that the reason he does not want to shake

hands is not to offend or hurt anybody’s feelings, but it is because he is following

the teachings of his religion. In most cases this will earn him respect from others. There

is no harm done if they find it strange at first, and it may even be a practical

opportunity for da’wah. And Allaah knows best.