To whom should a married man should give much preference, either his mother or wife?
Praise be to Allah.The Muslim should always give preference to his mother,
because it says in a hadeeth that a man said to the Prophet
(peace and blessings of
Allaah be upon him): “Who among the people is most deserving of my good
company?” He said, “Your mother.” He asked, “Then who?” He said,
“Your mother.” He asked, “Then who?” He said, “Your mother.”
…
(Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 5514; Muslim, 4621).
But the wife takes precedence over the mother in one
case, and that is the matter of spending. If the husband cannot afford to spend on both
his wife and his mother because he is poor, then in this case he should put his wife
before his mother. The Muslim has to give what is due to each person who has a right over
him, and he has to help the one who is oppressed. If his mother mistreats his wife, he has
to put a stop to it, in a kind and fair manner.
And Allaah knows best.