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Her father is forcing her to attend gatherings in which there are innovations (bid’ah). How should she behave with him?

Praise be to Allah.Firstly:

When reading this letter,

although we feel sad about what is mentioned in it, we feel happy when we

read of this sister’s common sense, intelligence and good following of the

Sunnah, and that she is upset at the presence of bid’ah and she is afraid of

falling into sin by disobeying her father who is telling her to go to the

place where these innovations are practised. She is also thinking of leaving

home but she is worried about her brother and sister and is afraid that she

will be going against sharee’ah if she does not have a mahram with her. All

of this, and she is a new Muslim. We ask Allaah by His names and attributes

to make her and her siblings steadfast in adhering to the truth, and guide

her family to follow the Sunnah.

Secondly:

We say to the sister who is

asking this question:

1.Undoubtedly attending these

gatherings with their innovations and sins is regarded as something that is

contrary to sharee’ah. Those innovators are not content with merely

mentioning the names of Allaah in song and dance, rather they had added

other sins, namely failing to offer the prayers on time. This indicates that

their claim that they are worshipping Allaah and drawing close to Him is

false. If they were sincere in their desire to draw close to Him, they would

worship in the ways that He has prescribed, and they would not miss the

prayer, which is the greatest practical pillar of Islam. The texts of the

Qur’aan and Sunnah issue stern warnings to those who do not offer the prayer

on time and those who neglect the prayer.

2.It is well known in sharee’ah

that attending such gatherings incurs a great deal of sin and leads to many

negative consequences, but there may be some interest to be served by

delaying one’s refusal to go, because that delay may bring benefits and ward

off harms.

3.One of the interests served by

your continuing to go now is taking care of your brother and sister and

making sure that there is someone with them who can guide them and explain

to them what is wrong with these actions. Another interest that will be

served is making sure that your non-attendance will not lead to your father

throwing you out of the house, which is something that would lead to many

evils and bad consequences, the extent of which no one knows but Allaah,

especially in the country where you live and even in other countries.

4.We think that you could

continue to go, but go as little as you can, and make up some excuses that

will be acceptable to your father for not going, as well as trying hard to

bring in wise people of Ahl al-Sunnah who can explain the truth to your

father.

5.A person such as you will not

be deceived, in sha Allaah, by what these ignorant innovators are doing.

Neverthless we advise you to protect your faith by doing acts of worship and

increasing your knowledge by reading and studying the books of Ahl

al-Sunnah. This will be beneficial for you. And ask trustworthy people of

Ahl al-Sunnah about everything that is not clear to you, and remember that

you have to keep advising and teaching and guiding your siblings. You should

also try to influence some of the other girls who attend these gatherings

and call them to the truth and the right path.

6.If you go there, we advise you

to avoid these gatherings as much as you can, by sitting with the women in a

separate room far away from these innovations and deviations. Be the last to

enter and the first to leave, as much as you can.

7.We advise you to sit with your

father and discuss with him what he is telling you to do, and to try to

convince him about these innovators. You are at an age where you can do that

with him. And you have enough knowledge to convince him in sha Allaah.

8.Always pray for your father and

advise him, and treat him well all the time, for “there is no kindness in a

thing but it adorns it, and it is not taken away from a thing but it makes

it defective” as the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon

him) said.

We ask Allaah to help you

to do that which He loves and which pleases Him, and to make you steadfast

in adhering to the truth, and to guide your father to the truth.

And Allaah is the Source of

strength.

Source: IslamQA (Sheikh Muhammed Salih Al-Munajjid)
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